Poor Taste, Insatiable Appetite

Credit Crunch, Downturn, Soft Economy, Recession, Depression even?

I prefer the term New Economy.
“New” Economy – as in, “I’m re-gifting these books to you, I really enjoyed them. Happy Birthday, in the New Economy.”

Well don’t tell that to the strip-mall-loving, one-person-per-car driving, army of uninformed consumers who flocked to the new strip mall in my hood on its Opening Weekend. This janky intersection of Elston and Logan Blvd. is choking with eager consumers. Eurika! Logan Square is fast becoming a city hub for buying crappy furniture.



What are they looking for?!
Well, JCO wants you to know, they are looking for cheap, shitty furniture!
Something for their next winter Dibs spot I guess.



There seems to be no end to the demand for unstable, particleboard laminate furniture. This shit comes in 1-3 faux wood shades, as well as, white and black. Remember, do not move, slide, relocate, reconfigure, or over load this fine piece of craftsmanship. Do not leave pieces out of its construction.

Besides being hidious, this stuff can be down right dangerous. Incidents of TVs and furniture crushing kids to death is on the rise!
See Attached Article

Thank goodness! The Poor Taste masses and their Insatiable Appetite for crap furniture rejoice! At this corner you have/had no less then SIX Stores where you can find what you're looking for!




1. Ace Hardware – Not really a hardware store – a place to buy outdoor candles and overpriced lawn furniture. They had a bunch of useful stuff too, like vacuums and shower curtains but no one knew they had it. Plus they never had the hardware stuff I was looking for. - now bankrupt and replaced by...


2. Joann Fabrics “Superstore” – takes this space over in an upgrade from a smaller store front. They used to just have fabric, but now you can buy some shit furniture there too.



3. Harlem “room place” – Looks like a ghost town in the same rambling strip mall in a sea of parking on the southeast corner of this monster intersection.

Sarah L.
Chicago, IL
I'm kind of wondering if this place is next for bankruptcy. Just like Wickes that used to be across the street from this place…

Niki C.
Chicago, IL
Had to return the furniture because it broke within a week. When it did break, they sent someone out to fix it, but as he pulled apart the sofa, we both realized that the sofa was made with ... cardboard. Yes. Cardboard. He told me that it wasn't uncommon with Harlem Furniture.



4. Home Depot - Overpriced versions of all kinds of things including, you guessed it, "furniture".

Andrew J.
Oh god, I HATE Home Depot. It's like the center of the universe for morons to work at.

This brings us to the tragic tale of...

5. Wickes – because there is seemingly endless demand, Wickes erected a 60,000 sq foot monstrosity to house their new super store right there in the middle of it all.....too bad fot them they were open less then a year, maybe 6 months. Now just a tragic shell, a place for Halloween USA to set up for a few months a year.


6. Target

Yoko
Chicago, Il

Its pressed particleboard, a step up from Wal-Mart but not much. If you move it wrong it will chip or splinter.......
Ive had better luck with quality and durability with IKEA

and last but not least -

7. Home Goods
This place was PACKED on it's opening weekend.

Feed the masses!!!! Gobble it up. Horrible bedroom sets for $650.00. Don't miss out!



Unfortunately, like most things, you get what you pay for when it comes to furniture. And the shit just don't come cheap. The best way to get some good stuff these days is Old School - Garage Sale - there you can find dressers made out of (gasp!) Real Wood! With (amazing!) metal drawer pulls! One of the benefits of this Real Wood is that it can be sanded and re-stained, or re-painted and then RE USED, even handed down or re-sold.
It has VALUE.